Fuck the
UB Real Men--Or Better Yet, Don't
One year ago,
I wrote an edit note for Generation entitled "Not a Real Man,"
detailing my concern regarding the Anti-Rape Task Force's (ARTF) annual
"UB Real Men" competition. I stated my belief that by inviting
men to compete with one another in a short essay contest with exhortations
such as "Well--if you are MAN ENOUGH that is" for the public
reward of being featured as a "Real Man" on posters and
calendars, was an infantile public relations stunt at best, and at
worst, drawing on macho imagery and reinforcing the rape culture in
which we live. I suggested that men are often praised for the same
humane behavior that is often expected and in many cases demanded
of women, and that a more equitable solution would be to simply feature
all of the ARTF staff, male and female, on the poster and publicity
materials.
While there was no official response to my statements, an anonymous
person filled my mailbox at the Generation office with ARTF propaganda
and informational brochures. Though I cannot say with any certainty
what they were trying to accomplish, it does appear that they were
trying to educate me, believing if I read their short bulleted-lists
of facts and propaganda, I would simply get in line and shut up. Color
me unimpressed with their educational efforts. From their pointless
misspellings (advertising "Violence Against Women's [sic] Awareness
Week" in a recent Generation and spelling feminist writer Andrea
Dworkin's name "Drowkin" on web pages and printed materials)
to feel good aphorisms, ARTF is consistently taking the easy way out.
I write this not just to criticize their actions, but to add to them.
"No means no" is not enough, and only reinforces the status
quo by masking serious issues of inequity behind a facile veneer of
consent. Rape does not happen because men are deaf and cannot hear
the word "no." Nor does it happen because men are dumb and
cannot understand what it means. Rape happens because of a vast system
of entitlements that men are raised to believe they have, and a culture
that reinforces their supremacy. The UB Real Men contest is one such
entitlement.
There is no similar reward for women who actively work against rape--our
expectations for men are so much lower that we have to give them diplomas
with gold seals or jackets that say "Real Man" in adoration
if they lift their smallest finger or say the right catch phrase.
While Take Back the Night rallies at other schools are controversial
in their separatism, men are often not allowed to march with the women,
UB's is open to both genders. So, not only do men get to participate
then, they get their own march as well, where women are in fact excluded
from and asked to stand on the sidelines in "support." It
is also telling that our last Take Back the Night rally was sponsored
by one of the biggest promoters of rape culture in our area, Cloud
Nine. On any given Friday night, you can watch underage women skit
across Main Street to the bar in high heels, braving the freezing
air in clothing that barely covers their body, while the men follow
behind leisurely in thick sweaters from Abercrombie and Fitch. The
same club in which the sorority "Delta Sig" recently sponsored
a "Jello wrestling" contest to raise money.
If this means nothing to you, ask yourself when was the last time
men were invited to wrestle in states of undress, not for competition,
but for women's approval? Or when men wore dangerous footwear and
crossed busy streets to gain the attention of women? Ask yourself
if you can really believe that this is not connected to men's perceptions
of women--and ultimately, their behavior towards them?
We live in a culture that that promotes the belief that women are
inferior. In the past week alone, President Bush has already closed
the White House Women's Initiatives and Outreach office, and courts
have ruled that web-sites advocating the murder of doctors who perform
abortions are legal. UB has yet to comply to Title IX in its athletics
program, and "Sex Week" at UB's theatres means Quills, a
movie featuring dead naked women as entertainment. Indeed, the Oscar
nominations for best Actress usually reads as a list of women who
played the best rape victim or most convincing psychotic nutcase.
Men fighting rape is nothing new--usually it has been over who gets
to rape women, as in traditional cultures, it was not a crime towards
a woman, but against the man who was responsible for her. Enforced
with social norms and threats of violence, this has changed little
in the past few thousand years. Even now, Jerry Springer devotes episodes
to having his security guards go to the homes of men who batter their
wives and teach them a lesson--that real men can keep their wives
"in line" without a struggle. These Right Honorable men
are given diplomas with gold seals, just as the men who participated
in the Men's March Against Violence at UB. That kind of entitlement
allows men to believe, and often demand, that women should trust them,
in a world where women are better off often not trusting men--especially
in trusting them to protect them from other men, as that protection
often comes at a price.
If you would like to make a true difference in turning our society
in a new direction, please write your Congressional Representative,
the honorable Jack Quinn, and tell him of your support for the recently
reintroduced Equal Rights Amendment--which would at long last make
equal treatment under the law, a permanent part of our constitution.
Jack Quinn
Main District Office
403 Main Street
Suite 240
Buffalo, NY 14203-2199
For Generation, this is
Richard Leader
